This is an all new blog from me, @JesusChristFTM. It will contain Scouse stories from the everyday
life on the mean streets of Liverpool and the knobheads/victims and bad squids it brings with it. Blogs will be from both ends of the spectrum and which most Scousers will already have encountered such as, 'going the barbers' to 'needing a fat shit in town'. Now we all know what it's like needing a moody turd when you're outside of your safe zone.
SAFE ZONE - Any proximity from your house to the end of the street.
This 'safe zone' becomes dodgy territory once passed as the closer you get to your door the more that turtles head squeezes through your clenched arse cheeks in millimetres. It's game over once the 'touching cloth' phase begins though. Swerve that.
TOUCHING CLOTH - When a turd is trying it's absolute hardest to get fresh air, having an extreme battle against your anal muscles.. and fucking winning.
Anyway, without getting side-tracked and talking too much about feces #TSB are keen on hearing your very own stories, what you've encountered, messy house parties or just everyday comical banter such as 'terrorising your mates' to look hard infront of girls, taking too many garys, stroking furry walls and regretting it.. or even kicking wheelie bins over because they're big.. and purple.. and for some reason when you're bladdered they look better horizontal then they do vertical. If you wish to add your own unique story to this blog then do not hesitate to contact thescousebible@hotmail.co.uk along with your Twitter username.
Amen. #TSB
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